fleur de leigh | Photography Blog by Leigh Caraccioli

Into the Wild...

2009-07-02T08:16:00.000-07:00

Find it funny that on the road to get to know myself & the world around, I first must walk through a door marked "unknown."

I have learned to embrace butterflies. The ones that fill your stomach before you do something daring. May seem a small act, going without technology/social media, for a handful of days, because I've chosen to cut my self off. (But tell that to the butterflies who have begun to occupy my tummy.)
Finding it a little sad saying goodbye to my friends on Twitter, Facebook for a four day #techblackout. To regroup, to touch the terra firma... for a spell.

Leigh
aka: Supertramp

Untethering the ties that bind.

2009-07-01T12:15:00.000-07:00

In celebration of Independence day I am doing something rare, although not unique. I am stealing a page from a pair of canons in American Literature, Emerson & Thoreau. I am going back to nature, into the wild, heading up for a long weekend with my family at my parents' remote lakeside home. The path up north has been tread hundreds of times. I have visited this land we call 40 Acres with it's cabins, glacier lake, lopsided dock, well water, and abounding wildlife for as many years as it has acres. An heirloom family laden Paradise. But here's the rub:

I am cutting the tether of technology. Pulling the plug! Well...for a handful of days at least. Four to be exact.

Being untethered this weekend (#techblackout) will mean no computer, no BlackBerry, no television (except I plan to cheat and watch Wimbledon!) no email, and this one pains me the most, no social media, no Twitter.

I'm not a real Transcendentalist. I love social media, society and the hustle-bustle of daily life. My way is a busy, electronic playground. But I have found that things we love can also become our undoing if we let them. So, I am declaring my independance from the ties (techstuffs) that bind me. This social experiment is more about FUNdaMENTALism. Skinny-dipping, that is metaphorically, getting down to the skin your in.

Seems a bit silly to say that I'll miss the constant communication with you all. The tweets, the cool bite sized info that fills the voids in the day, keeps my fingers busy, and in many ways warms my soul. But the techy tether is to be severed nonetheless. For these reasons:

I need to draw true warmth from my loved ones around me.
I want to sit and listen to the birds, feel the rift of waves on the side of the oar flanked boat.
I need to catch a large mouthed bass, with my father at my side.
I cannot hear, see, smell and taste as well when I am talking. (ie; tweeting)
I want to pay 100% attention to my husband who puts up with my social habits as best he can.
I plan to take a nap.
I plan to embrace the chatter of nature over the chatter of social society.
I need to plug back in to nature's outlet and feed my little outdoor girl soul.
I will sip wine, play bocce, shower with bottled water so as not to ruin my bought blondness.
I will be present, in the here and now, aware.
And, of course, I will take pictures.

The people I communicate with in social media have become more than robust personalities, they have become part of my daily life, they have become my friends. And it will be wacky to be totally with out that camaraderie. But, I'll be back Tweeting like it's going outta style on Tuesday.

Hope you all have a safe, wonderful, holiday!

(ps. very difficult to not be there for #followfriday, a day that make me smile all day. I'll catch up with you, though)

Leigh

Ready, Set....

2009-06-30T11:45:00.000-07:00

Remember the summer you were seven? Remember your toes hanging over the end of the dock, your heels defiantly holding firm? You hold the hand of your big cousin who has done this before and assures you you'll be fine. Your heart beats harder and you tighten your grip.

What's under the surface? What will it feel like? Will it hurt me?

And then something inside you triggers your body to take the plunge...and JUMP.

I had that same feeling a little while back while I held my finger over the enter button on my computer. My photography business had just begun and my website was about to launch....as soon as I pressed enter.

What's under the surface? What will it feel like? Will it hurt me?

And then I jumped! Yes, I was worried people wouldn't like my photographic style, that I would fail, that something would jump up and bite me. But I pressed enter. And emerged smiling and grateful for the challenge.

We, Jen, Ria, Suzanne, Morgan and I, want to share your adult thrills with you. We've been building a grown up clubhouse called Looking Glass Lane. You've seen us tweet about it but perhaps you haven't quite understood the function. We are the girls who will challenge you to stand at the end of the dock, and....JUMP. We are trigger pullers, dock jumpers, mischief makers, buzz generators, and cocktail party hostesses all in one (so hard to label.) Just because you are bigger, you are flanked with little ones of your own, you are running a company, or you're feeling fully "growed" these days doesn't mean you can't take advice from the seven year old inside of you.

For instance, here are a few nuggets of advice from my little self: (Leigh, age 5, shown above flirting with the photographer. I have rocks and snakes in my pocket, I guarantee it.)

Don't go places without wearing pockets. Treasures are everywhere and you only have two hands and one mouth.
Anything boys can do, you can too. Prolly better.
Laughing is THE best. Laughing should be a daily dose thing like water, sugar and food.
Shut your eyes 5 times a day, take a deep breath and snap a mental picture. You can replay them at night if you can sleep or if you're grounded.
When picking up snakes, don't grab 'em where they can bite you.
Oh, and hide candy in your pockets jus in case you do get grounded.
Chocolate melted in the sun is the finest chocolate. Just don't step in it! And melted in your pocket isn't good.
When grown ups look sad, hugging them helps. Or see if you can offer to fold clothes or get the mail while they happy up.
Be nice to your friends. Or they won't be your friends. And it's really hard to play kickball all by yourself.

While The Lane site is still under construction, we have already conjured up wonderful like-minded adventurers who have become part of the Looking Glass Community. They have written dossiers, demonstrated bravery, have inspired US, and have worn the team colors during our adventures thus far.

We're ready for shenanigans. We envision a site that will have you thinking, sharing and daring. Like Alice in Wonderland, we invite you to jump down the rabbit hole.

We are waiting for you...and we're already sure you CAN.

Morgan's getting hitched tomorrow!!!!!

2009-06-11T17:05:00.001-07:00

The looking glass girls have done it again...now my assignment is write a limerick for Morgan's @modernsinglemom 's Bachelorette Party tonight at 10pm which we will be ustreaming live. Yeah. We do weird social media stuff. We bring "haven't seen that done" to new levels. We want you to join us on Morgan's last night of SINGLEMOMHOOD!

Morgan, whom I call GlamRomantic has THE coolest love story to share. It will touch your heart and reel you in. I met her and instantly adore her!

For tomorrow, she #GetsHitched (you can watch the love tweeting happen there. I come on at 10:30!)

The Monster Vegas Photo Shoot!

2009-06-01T11:03:00.000-07:00

Only a few more days until I am packing my camera, extra batteries for Las Vegas, Baby, site of the Monster Vegas Tweet Up, June 5th!!

I will be photographing many of the Twitterfolk while I am there and wanted to have the pre-shoot info available for them and any other willing participants :)

T H E D E T A I L S
You, the Brand
Shoot with @fleurdeleigh
VEGAS, JUNE 5-6

What you can expect
First off, thanks for opting into the fun. This Vegas shoot will be fabulous as it will be sure to provide us with very interesting, robust images. Can’t wait!! Thanks to Hernan Valencia (my cool Vegas local :) I am looking into rocking spaces like the Neon Graveyard (see below) to serve as backdrops for our shoots. What your $150 session fee gets you: me chasing you around with my camera for about 45 minutes, a collection of images post processed in a vibrant variety of color and black & white in a web gallery with a link for you to share, a disc with all the images formatted for print and digital use along with the original ﬁles. Additionally, I’ll make any image you want into an avatar, lickety split.

What you need to bring
Your sense of humor and your true self. Easy enough, huh? Those I have photographed had fun, a willing smile and walked away with images that they felt express their personality and individual spirit. That’s my job. Also, my photo sessions are active, lively, busy, power-packed with laughter and fun. WARNING: I have been known to be armed with Nerf balls to catch you off guard. Back to business. Bring that which suits you. Let’s discuss props, outﬁts, your goals in advance individually. Shoot me a note for my cell phone number. Deﬁnitely, bring a “costume” change. Vegas will be hot, so I recommend you bring a towel to dab the face, and make-up just in case.

A few potential shoot sites
And I am I coming in a bit early to get some Urban settings under my belt. Trust me when I say, this is the coolest backdrop I have ever had to work with!! (Not that Dayton, Ohio doesn’t totally rock...) Here are few spots:

Neon Graveyard
El Cortez

Your homework
You heard me! Every shoot begins with three little words...about you. I ask that you provide me with three describers to help me visualize how I am going to capture you. (ie; me: sporty, creative, bubbly) Email your words to leighcaraccioli@gmail.com the sooner the better. Also, if you refer someone else to join us for the shoot, I’ll take $50 off your session fee. I like new clients and I believe the more fun folks we have the better. JACKPOT!!! (few spots available...)

Can’t wait to meet you all & capture your images. I already feel lucky!

9 Bold Steps to your Ultimate Career Lifestyle

2009-05-29T12:34:00.000-07:00

Are you a Poser or the Real Deal? Come see for yourself. A new blog post at Talent Revolution.

Create your dossier

2009-05-28T20:44:00.000-07:00

So many of you have wanted to create a dossier of your own so I have provided the nuts & bolts...The rest is up to you!!

(cut and paste into the comment section)

Name: (alias will also do)

Looking Glass Powers: (list a few abilities...think big)
Dress-up Closet: (what are the signature items in your wardrobe)
Disguise: (what do you don to go be noticed go unnoticed)
Go-To Gadget: (what item or device do you arm yourself with at nearly all times)
Vice: (what would you hide from your parents)

Magic Potion: (what is your cannot do without liquid and why)

Battery Recharge Hub (where to you plug in, get energ, re-establish you)
Bratty Spoilers: (when in a fit, what makes you all betta)
Owner's Manual: (What defines you in print, what illuminates you)

Weapon: (What is your tool, your device, your method)
Nemesis: (What are you up against, what challenges you)
Secret Ambitions: (What would your six- year-old self say you should grow up to be)

10 more characters bigger than 140

2009-05-28T10:53:00.000-07:00

All kidding aside, I love Friday's on Twitter. The ego in me remembers the very first #followfriday mention and has relished every single one after. The giver in me wants you extend that feeling to these brilliant people.

I follow many, many incredible people, over 6,000 of them. My goal is to get to know and to connect with all of them. In the meantime, let me introduce you to these remarkable tweeple, whose personality cannot be confined to 140 characters, ever!

@KimSherrell
Bio: producer/director of a new comedy project. i tweet about art, design, film, music, video, tech, culture + twitter … current projects: #artwalk #bob #casting :::
My take: She exudes positive energy, brilliance and levity the moment she pops up on the tweet stream. She's a giant.

@kyleplacy
Kyle Lacy
Bio: A socially creative Indianapolis resident.
My take: Kyle is deliberate, honest, and can dish out some very cool business acumen. I can always count on Kyle to tell it like it is.

@dannybrown
Bio: Join me for the 12for12k Challenge - social media for good. Ask me for information or visit http://12for12k.org
My take: Clearly committed to giving, Danny is also the founder of the 12for12k Challenge, a unique charity project using social media to change the lives of millions in 2009. More than that is a character that cares and dares to act.

@MissIve
Jen
Bio: Shenanigans for Hire
My take: Chances are if you're following me, you already know that she is my big girl playmate. I call her throwback ballsy. Her writing in her blog is daring, wickedly fun, and fresh. She has captured me and made me part of the Looking Glass Lane collaboration adventure.

@r27
Rajesh Pancholi
Bio: R27.CREATIVELAB | Design & Visual Communications | Design for Print, Web & Identity | Creative Guns For Hire | Blog: http://r27creativelab.blogspot.com
My take: Hands down THE most genuinely helpful creative I have met on Twitter. I am most indebted to him although he'd disagree. Gentlemanly yet a rascal. Must follow.

@styletime
Roger Byrne
Bio: Social Media and Design, sharing inspiration, originally from England now in Egypt! Work with the cool Envato crew!
My take: If you want buckets of social media digestible info along side cool edgy wit, follow him. He's a earnest vanguard on Twitter.

@mayhemstudios
Calvin Lee
Bio: Self-Proclaimed Media Ho, Designer Guy and Twitter Addict. In his spare time, Stunt Doubles for the Hulk and a really Nice Guy! You can even ask Chris Brogan.
My take: I wish I sat next to Calvin in high school a) because he would know everything, b) because he would help me know everything c) because you know he is ready to throw spit balls as needed. Awesome fella whom I get to take photos of in Vegas next week!!

@LaBarceloneta
Claire Jackson
Bio: Hispanic. Transgendered. Artistic. Liberal. Lesbian. Fond of verbal evisceration. Surprisingly chipper.
My take: Based on the bio, real comes to mind. She is a charming conversationalist and has bitingly funny approach to life.

@smashadv
Jim Mitchem
Bio: Hello. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die. (father/copywriter/ceo/married to @tinamitchem)
My take: His clever intuitive writing grabs me and his playful humor keeps me.

@SarahRobinson
Bio: Chief Hooligan for #tweepletuesday. Playing Big, supporting, motivating, writing, speaking, online biz owners who are great moms, wife, mom.
My take: She has southern charm and girl-next-door qualities that make you want to sit on the veranda drinking sweet tea planning your future business endeavors. (I also have the pleasure of photographing this Twitter butterfly next week.)

Awaiting YOUR Dossier...

2009-05-27T05:09:00.000-07:00

dos-si-er :
noun a collection of documents about a particular person, event, or subject.

In teaming up with this incredibly inspiring group of youthful minded smarty pants, (a.k.a my Looking Glass Lane collaborators) we all had to create our own dossiers to bring with us to LGL. What ensued was outroaring laughter.
Now on Twitter and Facebook, I am seeing this Dossier movement take flight! It was a little dose of what we aim to illicit from our friends or readers at The Lane...coercion toward fun self-discovery. Let's face it...disclosure can be fun and inspiring. I am amazed at the incredibly souls who've tapped into the Dossier fun: (more arrive every day!)

Steph
April
Christeen
Jenn
John
Nakia
Keith

Here's where it started...
Suzanne "terra firma esoteric"
Morgan "Mega Glama Romantic"
Jen "ballsy hooligan"
Ria "sexy tech"

Enough ado. Here's mine...

Leigh

Looking Glass Powers:
Ability to hop up the average photo with a wave of a magic wand (a.k.a. Photoshop).
Ability to razzle dazzle with wordy words.
Ability to go invisible for a moment when the housework is looking for her.
Ability to conjure the inner child, rockstar, superhero, and spy in others in the Twitterverse.

Dress-up Closet:
Banana Republic, Chuck Taylors, Michael Starr T's, snug jeans. At least one stunningly simple black dress. And necklaces. Lots of pretty necklaces. OPI nail polish, preferably not self-applied.

Disguise:
SuperProductivity Cape. English school teacher armed with Burberry specs, tight skirt, and a ruler.

Go-To Gadget:
Nikon D300, iPod (ruined in washer) and the BlackBerry. All should be waterproof.

Vice:
Speeding and propensity for overindulgence. But never both at once!

Magic Potion:
Elixirs of choice include cold beer almost any flava and Pinot Noir. You won't catch her dead with a girly vodka drink. Followed by H2O in copious amounts.

Battery Recharge Hub (other than Looking Glass Lane, of course)
Augusta National Golf Course, the city of New Orleans or the back of the Harley Davidson.

Bratty Spoilers:
The first tee with a wide green fairway. When that doesn't fix her, feed her pizza and 23 oz of beer.

Owner's Manual:
Where the Wild Things Are
The complete works of William Shakespeare
Tweetdeck
The Joy of Cooking (ROTFL, just seeing if you're paying attention)

Weapon:
A lasso to gain control, her 3-iron with graphite stiff shaft, the unsuspecting somersault.

Nemisis:
Alter Ego
Bacon
Focus
High drama

How she gets to the Lane:
Rapidly and four-wheeling with a top-down Jeep. Perhaps in a bikini depending on weather conditions...

Secret Ambitions:
Spyhood

This is the part where I dare you, double dare you, to create your own personal dossier and share it with us. Here's mine:

How'd the dossier craze come about?
On the heels of our Bad Mother social networking event with author Ayelet Waldman, I've linked arms with four supergirl, lively hooligan bloggers from Twitter @MissIve @RiaSharon @ZenMommy @modernsinglemom to shake things up a bit! We have set a sight in motion called Looking Glass Lane or @LookingGlassLN that is duofold full blown playtime fun and savvy viral marketing. You may have seen us using #LookingGlass in tweets for reference. We feel that just because you're "all growed up" doesn't mean that playtime is over. While we envision a website "house" that you can visit for big kid Adventures in Wonderland, self-discovery, enlightening book clubs, worldly diversions, fashion and style sizzle.

Under construction soon, the site will be part swanky lounge, part bean bag chair intimate chats, part enrapture. We invite you and you inner six-year-old! Make sure you sign our guest book to be kept aware of exciting new developments on Looking Glass Lane. Cool new stuff like a working web site, delicious new capers, exciting marketing partners. Next we engage you, learn about you, and award & embellish you. (YAY!) Our next big adventure is being schemed...right now.

Hugest thanks to Rajesh Pancholi of R27 CreativeLab ( @r27 ) for his fabulous creativity and kindness on this project.

10 characters bigger than 140

2009-05-21T19:40:00.000-07:00

This #followfriday let me introduce to you 10 vibrant individuals with giant personalities.

While seemingly confining, 140 characters can pack a punch. I love the brevity of Twitter and find it remarkable how some personalities bust out of such a small space. This blog is not about the always polite, the sweet retweeters, the obigatory in any way. Rather these 10 people flat out draw you in grab you by the collar and confound the 140 characters with a robust individuality (part one of two by the way.) They are free thinkers, honest, optimistic and real.

@iamkhayyam Playful, avant guarde, full throttle real, creative and a joy to watch. See his dig on #followfriday here.

@StaciJShelton She has a presence that you feel the moment she is in your stream like someone just twisted open the shades and let the brightness in. She is a blend of pure optimism, biz mind, and heart. You'll enjoy her blog.

@sethsimonds Face it. The man fears not. Eats status quo for breakfast. He turned heads this week when he dropped all 45K of his followers. But at the crux was a man who wanted more genuine connections which I admire. His blog requires coffee and thick skin. (Warning: Can't guarentee a follow back though ;)

@RiaSharon I code named her sexytech because she has skills you just wouldn't expect of a beautiful momma blogger. Getting to know Ria in collaboration for Looking Glass Lane (under construction) let me in to her straight-forward loving, laugh at yourself grace that has changed me. She affects people near her. POSITIVELY.

@unmarketing He IS Twitter. He teaches, inspires, keeps us in line, sings *makes pained face,* retweets and represents marketing upended. He made Twitter real for me. If your not following him, put your teeth bak in and bite yourself!

@sexythinker When my husband introduced me to Amanda he should have said "This woman will change your life." A passionate visionary who simply wants everyone to live the Ultimate Career Lifestyle: Be Real, Be Relavant, Be Passionate. She has built a career network community with Talent Revolution that is amazing....and she is about to publish her hot book/ebook.

@lruettimann She is bold, hilarious, unfiltered, flanked by cats and has a whip smart HR mind. She immediately impressed me by the duofold ability to make me think hard and laugh harder with 140 characters. She's a keeper! Punk Rock HR.

@thetylerhayes He's likely to sit the ball back with spin and speed when you send one over the court to this young turk. Tyler is a self proclaimed rascal who is part web savvy cool geekness and part full blown youthful swagger.

@frankidurbin Her blog life in a venti cup is a divine read. This darling cooks, writes, moms, zips about in the ultimate driving machine and ultimately inspires. To boot, she does it all with haute couture & caffeine.

@SmartZombie He calls himself and "incurable optimist" which goes down like a happy pill. He's witty, delightful and a devoted father. Cartoony yes, but don't let the Wolverine claws fool you. He is a devoted daddy! His website.

Part two of the Twitter personalities next week.

Twitter Photographers who inspire me! #followfriday

2009-05-13T11:21:00.001-07:00

There is something bedazzled about Friday's on Twitter that makes me want to thwart of trite with new ways to illuminate fun follows. Believe me. I am surrounded by thousands of fabulous photographers, some that I am just getting to know. This list will be ongoing. This list pays no homage to the photog elite who equate followers with fan and do not participate in the dynamic exchange of ideas. Rather this list is about those photographers who are ALL IN and making a difference in the community at large.

@chasejarvis
Bio: Manic photographer director
My 2 cents: His style is eye candy, he gets social media, and he has his fingers on the pulse of the industry trends.
His website: Chase Jarvis

@abbyharenberg
Bio: Weddings/portraits/events/lifestyle photographer, love to photograph people.
My 2 cents: She is a natural socialite who is kind, diverse, and social media savvy.
Her website: Abby's Digital Photography

@photojack
Bio:world, travel, lifestyle, stock photographer. Social Media coach and consultant to #togs. Husband. Father. Austinite.
My 2 cents: Gentile and amiable, he tweeted: #togsfollow daily. share the love. spread the word. build up you "group capital". recommend other photographers. keep up the mojo.
Check out his multimedia futuristic website.

@modernsinglemom
Bio: Social Media Maven in Training, romantic, single mom, photographer, blogger, genuinely interested in people. Dedicated to making each day sparkle.
My 2 cents: Her photoblog is full of high mood, romanticism and whippy smart writing. Love this chic! I met her this weekend in an Ultimate Career Lifestyle Seminar and was blown away by her beauty & robust spirit. She's a collaborator on the exciting new Looking Glass Lane (a.k.a. Adventures for all grown up girls)

@biggaboss
Bio: Founder of Twittographers.com Where twitter and photographers meet! Web Developer, Photographer, IT Geek! Looking to be Happy in Life!
My read: He is unifying the photography community with his site and his charming, gracious personality.

@_kelli
Bio: photographer/wife/mom looking to bring a little more joy into the world.
My 2 cents: Her blog is filled with sunshine and advice like remembering to bring your camera everywhere with you.
Website: kelli jane photography

@darrinballman
Bio: Bio photographer and all-around wine & food junkie.
My 2 cents: I adopted him as a mentor because he didn't laugh at me for not know what f/stop was. His hands on help has been paramount for me. He'll help you with anything related to his two passions, photography and red wine.
His website.

@kelliekano
Bio: wedding/lifestyle photographer juggling 2 studios, 2 amazing little boys & a musician hubby. I'm addicted to coffee & all things vintage..
My 2 cents: She has a youthful, solid style, writing and photo capture accumen that I adore.
Website: photoblog.

@chrismathews
Bio: Photographer, Apple Enthusiast, Geek.
My 2 cents: This young turk's cup fillith over with raw photo journalistic talent. He is one to watch!
His photoblog.

@paulgiunta
Bio: Husband, Photographer, Blogger, Photoblogger, Scientist.
My 2 cents: He's attentive, interesting and engaging on Twitter.
His photoblog.

@GravittPro
Bio: Wedding and Event Videographer, Photographer, WAHM of 3 amazing boys, & wife of 1 good man!
My 2 cents: Absolute doll who coincidentally might be my twin because she confessed to a garbage disposal grow-a-frog mishap. A badge of dishonor that we both share. Among other things ;0.
Website: Gravitt Productions

@MikeJonesPhoto
Bio: Wedding, Senior, and Family Photog. for North Texas.
My 2 cents; He's gregarious, helpful, and funny.
His website.

Twitter, Make me Privy

2009-05-13T05:32:00.001-07:00

The Twitter Kings have spoken. Our communications are snuffed. I don't get snuffed quietly!

In response to yesterday's Twitter changes which fundamentally alter the flow of communication on a site I love, I feel deserted on an island. On an Island with tons of other outraged Twitterers who are tweeting their opinions through #fixreplies In yesterdays post @biz explains the changes:

Based on usage patterns and feedback, we've learned most people want to see when someone they follow replies to another person they follow—it's a good way to stay in the loop. However, receiving one-sided fragments via replies sent to folks you don't follow in your timeline is undesirable. Today's update removes this undesirable and confusing option. (Full blog here.)

How the Twitterverse runs is frankly too confusing for me to understand. I'm blond, one-brained, and tech-challenged. But my mantra is simplicity: If it ain't broke, don't fix it. (My English professors just disowned me) After a little bit of research, I feel the folks at Twitter world headquarters have "fixed" the unbroken. How Facebook of them!

Ultimately, I want to know how the changes affect how I use Twitter for social networking. How the exchange of @replies has been effected can be found in Andrew Lewin's insightful article, Twitter told to #fixreplies!

I write this article, because I believe change can happen here reverting us back to the Twitter where I get to see my conversations fully and the conversations of others acurrately. But change takes a movement of positive force. Let's do this...together.

Say it with me. Twitter: MAKE ME PRIVY!

Leigh

Confessions of a Bad Mother

2009-05-05T11:16:00.000-07:00

Reflections on how hard decisions test our mettle in Motherhoodlam. Put down your gavel, your judging looks, your quest for mommy martyrdom. And share YOUR story.

#badmother: Embracing Motherhoodlam

2009-05-03T20:05:00.001-07:00

Perhaps it's some strange boomerang mommy karma that gives me the opportunity to read Ayelet Waldman's socially charged and brutally honest book Bad Mother: A Chronicle of Maternal Crimes, Minor Calamities, and Occasional Moments of Grace, before it officially hits bookstores this Tuesday, May 5th. This new book grew wings from her highly controversial New York Times essay, Motherlove which met caustic disapproval of the stoic moms hellbent on the idealism of being a perfect mom.

Follow this link to Join us MONDAY, MAY 11th at 12 noon EST:

Ustream Live Broadcast

For those of you who know me, you've seen my candid, humorous, heartfelt illumination of my being a working mother. It's messy, let me assure you. My two year old just told me to "focus Mommy." In a social networking collaboration, I am linking arms with four other dynamite mothers who share my quest to be a good mother and an acceptance that we'll will never be on the public podium of Perfect Mom. We are a bevy of bold bloggers who want to conjure a conversation with you other mothers and fathers on the subject of parenting. Here's the important mommy topic d'jour.

When reading this passage from this insightful, bittingly funny book about the scrutiny of societal pressure on flawed moms like myself, I heard my voice in Ayelet's:

"I on the other hand, was supposed to be doing this good mother thing, this care-taking thing, this Gymboree and Music together and baby massage thing, but unlike my husband, filling my traditional domestic role didn't make me happy. It didn't feel like I had come into some deeper understanding of what it meant to be a woman and a mother. It just felt like I'd gone astray, that I was stuck in a hole I had dug for myself, a hole I was not supposed to want to escape. And complicating all this was the fact that I loved these children so much. "

Upending the lofty career aspirations of women like me in favor for a diaper-filled, domestic day in stay-at-home motherhood, seems shear madness. When my daughter was born and my (now ex) husband insisted that I opt to stay home, I felt up to the task after the thrill-of-the-kill highs of Sales & Marketing. I approached momness as I do everything, certain that I’d be successful. Little did I know that while I adore my children and earnestly try to be the attentive female pillar my mother was, I would fall short. Daily.

Even as a messy ponytailed youth, I wasn't ever found playing with dolls aping motherhood like my little sister. I was controlling the wind from a rock or unearthing nightcrawlers for an early morning fishing adventure with my brother. Of course, I wanted to have children and to share my life with them. But, the not at the sacrifice of all the other parts of me.

I contemplated the notion of Good Mother. Good Moms were even-tempered, child worshiping, healthy lunch bag carrying beings with a finely tuned calendar full of family planned activities, soccer games, school plays. I found myself like an actress, a Bad Mother in costume, donning the role everyone expected of me. A misfit.

Good mothers simply DO NOT let time slip away from them while working, look down and realize that they have missed picking up their kindergartner at the bus stop and would receive a call from the school transportation department who was holding a beautiful daughter hostage. Wiping away mascara, I faced the disapproving looks of school staff mothers who would have me wear a scarlet letter "M" for gross maternal negligence. They frowned at me.

Reading Ayelet's book made me open raw wounds of how I perceive myself as loving but impostor mother in relation to the really good moms out that abound. It made me commiserate with the author about the juggling that is required of working moms and gave me comfort that I am not alone in self-scrutinizing my maternal role. Bad Mother made me understand myself and forgive myself for my shortcomings. Even, laugh about them.

In an act of solidarity I've joined these the bright, brave bloggers:

Jen Wright, (@MissIve)

Ria Sharon (@riasharon)

Suzanne Tucker (@ZenMommy)

Morgan Siler (@modernsinglemom)

Yours truly (@fleurdeleigh)

Check out Suzanne Tucker's video on

BADMOTHER: How to Stop “Should-ing” on Yourself!@#

We are taking Badmotherhood viral by discussing this powerful book, its impact on us, and we are engaging with you about the honesty of motherhood, or in my case motherhoodlam. I plan to share my inner tug-a-war, selfishness and maternal inadequacies with you. And, here's the fun part you play. In return, please make my day by sharing your voice with us. For all you Twitter folks, join us on Twitter by including the hashtag #badmother in your tweet. Check out the live feed here .

We are going live in a no holds barred discussion the day before the book hits the shelves. The brave author/poster child for Bad Mothering, Ayelet Waldman, is joining us on Monday, May 11 th, Noon EST.

We want you to lend your voice, to pop in here and take part. We welcome an genuinely honest conversation with you. And since you tend to forget things like school lunches, don't worry. Sign up below and we'll remind you that day of our sit in chat with Ayelet. We will even send you a copy of the first chapter of Bad Mother so you can express your thoughts of this great piece of stirring writing.

Step 1: Sign up below to be emailed a free first chapter of Ayelet Waldman's Bad Mother: A Chronicle of Maternal Crimes, Minor Calamities, and Occasional Moments of Grace before it is available in print.

Step 2: Have a heart to heart with your inner mother and come discuss it with us on Twitter, in our blog comment sections, on Facebook in our Bad Mother online bookclub. We strive to give every mother, good, bad or otherwise a healthy forum.

Step 3: Plan to join us for the live chat with AYELET as her honest witty self. We will post the live stream here!!!

Follow Friday

2009-04-07T11:43:00.000-07:00

Friday's on Twitter Rock! Because this week will find me surrounded by family for the holiday and glued to The Masters Golf action, I will not have my usual computer access. Besides, I have been feeling squished by the 140 character allotment anyway for all these 30 incredible people have done for me, personally. So, I am doing something different this week for #followfriday on Twitter.

Twitter would not have grabbed me by the lapels and pulled me in to stay if it weren't for these Tweeple. I adore these folks and feel indebted to them. I want to share them with you. They did their homework and provided three words to describe themselves (some kicking and screaming like toddlers) shown in parenthesis.

Ladies First,

@sexythinker (intense, inspirational, cool) This passionate, upbeat, futuristic professional brought me to the Twitter party...and I never left! She is the heart & soul of Talent Revolution, a cutting edge career resource community and she captains so many bright minds who I admire. Follow this young visionary and she'll lead you to a better future. Trust me. I know! Link here

@MissIve (curious, grateful, excited) I was drawn to her from her spicy, toe-to-toe quick banter, and her diverse writing abilities. Her blog is an experience like rolling down the car window on a fast drive in the fresh air. Her antics are epic. She's the "she" in shenanigans! Be prepared to play with reckless abandon. (If not, she'll twist your arm! Really will I assure you.) Link here

@StaciJShelton (positive, happy, enthusiastic) When this enchanting lady landed in my tweet stream, my world got a whole lot brighter. Combining compassion, enthusiasm, business acumen in her tweets, she operates with relentless optimism. She adds sunshine to Twitter. Follow her & you'll feel her warmth naturally. Link here

@pifphoto (driven, inspired, humble) Darling, jazzy, bright and daring, Lindsay was one of the first photographers I followed. Instantly she struck me as a giant giving spirit. She created the photographer's resource community at Pay It Forward Photo with the intention of helping others achieve their goals. I reached out to interview her because I admired her noble endeavor, she nabbed me to interview for the pif team. You'll love her, but don't believe her when she takes credit for creating Post It Notes. I did! Link here

@modbird (silly, silly, and silly) Creative and friendly, this dear Floridian has a penchant for design an a knack for sincere conversation. It is evident that she finds Twitter a nice diversion from her computer workload. She breaks away for Yoga & time with real life friends but always comes back to us :) Link here

@RootedInStyle (intuitive, loyal, fiery) She told me that she loves textures and it made sense after I understood the multiple dimension of this great gal. Her website is welcoming, visually & mentally. Take a look: Link here

@Mama_Red (passionate, powerful, joyful) She's a dynamo. This woman loves people, laughing, coffee, her family....even us "adopted" ones from Twitter. Her mom sixth sense is remarkable as she can tell when your down by the sound or lack of your tweets and she'll find you and make you all better. Wonderful boisterous heart. Link here

@GravittPro (creative, optimistic, loyal) We are consulting our parents because we think we may be photographer, mommy, married to hotties, kindred spirited sisters separated at birth. She is the ONLY other person I know who accidentally killed daughter's grow-a-frog in the disposal. We're twins. Link here

@SarahRobinson (sassy, strategic, creative) High energy, noble hearted and devoted to a cause, Sarah is in many ways the girl next door. A Maverick Mom with a golden heart. She is the Twitter hostess behind #tweepletuesday which serves as a way to introduce followers to one another. And she’s a rascal which is why I adore her! Link here

@mmcgovern (curious, creative, engaging) A renaissance women creative & bright. Her view of the world is truly one to see. She mixes fashion and form brilliantly. She makes me think…which isn’t an easy task! Link here

@AnnaKDeLeo (fabulous, fashion, passion) Stylish, smart, charming, this gal is one I know I would sit down next to and not want to leave. This Bostonian is always a good solid read.

@OPCGal (funny, caring, colorful) When I was cyber bullied, she along with several of the other folks here immediately jumped in to help. She is dear and has a warm sense of savvy humor. Link here

@MelanieO (passionate, intense, fun loving) This wine loving, clever lady is a fun follow. She chimes in with humor and advice just when you need it.

@carece (energetic, positive, engaging) Carece has grace and a business mind that makes her fun to watch. Deeply caring, I have grown to appreciate her positive tweets. She puts things in proper perspective for me. Link here

@suzanneally (truth-seeker, fun-maker, color-painter) This bright and playful artist is a neighbor of mine here in Ohio. She always ready to join the fun and makes delightful company. Link here

And Gentlemen

@imjustcreative Graham is a bit of a twitter enigma, an individual always diverting the spotlight on the highlights of others and in doing so has developed a following or grateful creative admirers. He was the first person to bring twitter to life virally for me by making me a part of the mono expressions personal portraits feature. He is a robust creative, a wealth of knowledge, wry and ethereal all in one. A must follow, super cool, humble logo chap. Link here

@adbert (silly, neighbor, friend) The music man, full of heart and soul. He frequents the Twitter & blip.fm scene like a good Samaritan. Daily he sends me a smile whether he knows it or not. He's larger than life. Link here

@r27 (open, creative, driven) This gentleman offered to lend me a creative hand unsolicited, featured me in a blog, and has helped me at every turn. He has challenged me to evaluate my professional message vastly changing what I know about design and blogging. He is a noble businessman. For him, I am indebted and I am brainstorming how to return the favor in kind. Link here

@iamkhayyam (witty, charming, foolery) He is a playmate,cohort, and genuine fun fella. He's so versatile I have a hard time defining his many links make me smarter or make me laugh typically. He'll twitter wrastle and dish some satire now and again. He has reached out to me with a genuine heart that truly admire. Link here

@mayhemstudios (spikey, haired, troublemaker) The nice guy, it guy of all things twitter and design. He'll volley a few smack talking fun tweets just to show you he's not all business. I am fairly certain, the sweet man never sleep and had 8 arms based on his work load and Twitter activity! Link here

@unmarketing (geek, happy, grumpy) Hands down the shizzle on twizzle. This Canadian is a social networking demi-god with a unconventional business approach that hits home to his 20K plus followers. Mostly, he is all heart and seems to give a part to every single person he meets. To know him is to know him and appreciate him. He changed the way I Twitter with his daily tweet and upended my experience for the positive in Twitterland. Absolute "Awesomesauce." Link here

@ricklondon (tall, dark, humble) He'll be the guy in your corner and the guy who will make you bust a gut laughing. Loads of sound, fun, tweets. He's big ol awesome! Link here

@Dragoncade (thoughtful, photographer, blogger) THE sweetest dragon on twitter. This fella will greet you hello, bid you goodnight and do it with the purest of intentions. He makes Twitter a genuine, positive, nice place. Link here

@danlopez2012 (warm, engaging, witty) Super-charged, multifaceted, motivational and funny this dad is an all around cool guy. And on top of that he is a FOCUS coach...now where was I? Super follow.

@kyleplacy (driven, stubborn, creative) He's good clean business smart Twitter. His tweets are relevant & well fed. "Socially creative," great blog content and fabulous to follow. I do remember that he locked himself out of his office so I have a soft spot in my heart for him ;) Link here

@kufarms (caring, passionate, curious) He's the down to earth guy next door, compassionate father, engaging conversationalist, and bright professional. He seems poised and ready for anything. Link here

@Jon_Aston (enthusiastic, warm, giving) He sums it up in his description but he is also playful, committed to causes and community. On one occasion in particular, this kind man was relentless in helping me stop a cyber bully. He's like a twitter big brother to me.

@c_reed (sincere, edgy, lucid) Chris Reed's style is understate and totally stated at the same time. He created my logo and is my regular go to guy for all the technical mishaps I have on a regular basis. His tweets are thoughtful, clever & bold. He & Amanda Hite made the Talent Revolution website the coolness that it is! Link here

@danieljohnsonjr (connector, inspiring, teacher) What a nice guy. Down the road from me this man seems to be a magnet for tweeple and is genuinely interested in doing good with social media. I also like that he Tweeted: "I have regular stare-downs with the man in the mirror. I remind him that he's better than he thinks he is."

@mdrisser (helpful, creative, focused) He often puts a smile on my face from a tweet with clarity, wry wit or heart. He"ll claim that he's making a mess of things but I'd venture to say the opposite. Link here

Messy Mornings

2009-04-07T10:33:00.000-07:00

When I think about motherhood and life in general, the images that come to the forefront first are the messy, tousled, coffee stained moments I spend with my children in the hours of sunrise. Maybe this is a product of being a photographer, but literally when I close my eyes I see this way. And perhaps you can understand why I feel so fortunate, every single sleephead morning.

The other day, while I was playing a game of Trouble with my daughter (8), "Mommy's little monster" decided to bring me my coffee. Both the stain and the sweet memory of his gesture remain. My son and I share a birthday, a happy spirit, and the inability to sleep in. This two year old alarm clock yells from his crib for me to join him often before the sun. Then once released from confines of his crib, he gathers blankie and sets off to wake his sissy (not an early bird).

We all sit down and slide step by step downstairs to start our day. On school days, it's all about getting the backpack loaded, the paperwork signed, the kids fed, the weather appropriate clothing on and we dash to the bus stop.

On weekends, we laze about. Checking email, Twitter, playing games, wrestling on the floor, playing with cars, cows, or coloring books. We deliver coffee to Daddy fighting over who gets to carry the newspapers. Then I burn bacon and we all laugh and open the windows regardless of outside temperature.
We giggle, I correct, sip our juice, coffee or milk and prep for the day. They chase each other like wild fools. I referee. Max pleads his case with his Sissy "Poo-it, Scoo do & mean monsters?" and she smiles at me because it's his a.m. video of choice. And we roll our eyes knowing that I have to have my hand on the trigger to fast-forward all the "scary monster" parts for the little guy.

Regularly I think, how quickly the months, seasons, years pass. Soon these little joys will be big and creating their own morning rituals. I'll have these images to reflect on the special dawns I shared with my family.

Time should stand still for long enough for us to soak all this great stuff in, but it won't relent.

The coffee sets in as does my Type A, full speed ahead approach. As soon as my mind is fully awake, I get easily ladened with "what's next" and these precious timeless moments come to pass. The To Do list needs me. The chores, the business opportunities and the bills, responsibilities take hold.

And just like that another brilliant day ensues.

Enhancing Twitterland with Stuff Your Mom Already Taught You

2009-04-05T12:26:00.000-07:00

I rarely (o.k. never) go a day without Twitter impacting me. I tell a tale of the positive, educational, Tour de Force of this social networking land to everyone who will listen. A few people have asked me to help them to understand Twitter simply. So, I will remind you how to enhance your Twitter experience by using what you already know...from your Mom!

1. Hold Hands
Get out and get to know people. Take the initiative to meet new people, high five someone who deserves kudos, lend a hand to a follower in need. I started with people that I admired in the photography industry and branched out from there. Do searches on your interests to find cool folks to follow with common interests and like mindedness.

Awesome Twitter search tool: TwitPwr (link via @AlexKaris)

I typically peruse the person's Twitter homepage to be sure they are positive, engaging, and interesting. Then I "hold hands" and follow. If you need help, send me a Direct Message and I'll advise or watch Follow Friday happen for awesome suggestions of great follows.

2. Play Nice
My mom always said "If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all. Which side of the of magnet are you?" The side that draws others in to stay or the side that repels? Scott Stratten (@unmarketing) first taught me that each day you should take some time to stop listen and reply to others in an engaging manner. Send out a few @replies to tweets that catch your eye. That type of playing nice makes Twitter rock!

3. Share
By all means, share with us your photos, your funny stories, your heartfelt causes, your hilarious links, your creative ideas and your sound opinion. There is no better global show & tell than Twitter. Don't forget to pass on through a retweet (RT) something that you find helpful or moving. Endorse your friends. They like that. It shows them you're listening while caring.

4. Never Arrive Empty Handed
Don't get stymied by having something super important to say. I have tweeted about cheese, Scooby Doo, and calling my cellphone to locate it. But Bring Something to the party. Providing value is the key with a good recipe of self expression, friendship, professional information, and promoting others.

5. Have the Best Intentions.
If you wander Twitter with good intentions, your followers will grow organically and your experience will be enriched. Ask yourself periodically what's important to you Tweet with that honest intention in mind. People who are self-serving and all about self-promotion have no "hidden" agenda. I unfollow that type of Twitter taker. Most of all, have fun with it! Right, Mom?

Leigh
@fleurdeleigh
ps. Even my MOM is on Twitter. You can do it!

Your Twitter Thumbprint

2009-03-23T11:24:00.000-07:00

The Twitter experience is nothing if not unique. How each of us tweet, how we share and what we draw from the experience creates our own Twitter Thumbprint. Nary a one the same.

When I was asked the other day, “How can I get a bunch of followers in a short time span” I drew silent. (Uncharacteristic, I know.) That is so not Twitter to me! I suddenly realized that the questioner and I were not ideological Twitter bedfellows. Clear to me was the fact that this fellow wanted numbers, big numbers, tons of cool followers for his home page. Ego buffering, perhaps. And as we spoke a bit more, I suspected that my Twitter Thumbprint which has allowed me the organic growth of a couple thousand new followers was not what he wanted out of Twitter.

I can only tell you that I find Twitter both a classroom and a playground bustling with wise teachers and hilarious playmates. The experience that I have had with Twitter these last few months has been remarkably positive. So, I will share with you my thumbprint.

Here’s how I twitter. If it resembles your intentions and goals for Twitterland, you may find it helpful. If you seek the transparent popularity that of the “10K followers in two months” folks deem possible, my thumbprint won’t suit you. And I'll fashion you a glittery "Muy Popular" paper crown.

Throw a line out.
After spending some time viewing others on the Twitter stream one day, I finally casted out my own line. Prior to that moment, my tweets were literally “What are you doing now? answers with little value to anyone but me who already knew the answer to that question in the first place. I had 67 great followers most of whom I knew in person and I followed double that. My lightbulb experience came when I began engaging in dialogue with other tweeple, retweeting what I found interesting, and seeking ways that I could do some of these awesome new followers a kindness. I shared their links, I recommended them to others, I left a sincere comment on their blog. I tweeted about it in a 140 character version of this, my Twitter mantra:

The moment when you stop viewing your followers as a SUM and see them instead as a SOMEONE, then Twitter becomes meaningful.

Be yourself, be sincere, be interested.
To truly benefit from this social networking tool you need to know your intention clearly. I am a friendly, upbeat person forever open to learning from others. So I behaved true to myself. Each time I had a new follower my first step was a visit to their home page to paruse their tweets and follow a website link. It’s easy for me to find a interesting bit about everyone, I like people, so I sent a DM thanking them for the follow with a genuine nugget about why I was glad to be following them. That’s when I started meeting many rockstar “someones.” Unfortunately, to keep greeting followers individually as they arrive has become too time consuming to maintain. Girl's gotta work, eat & sleep too.

Seek out followers with common interests.
Twitter is not one size fits all. Do a self analysis on your interests and plug it into Twitter Search. You'll be shown tweeple who are talking about that very topic. I do this every so often to get akin followers. I explained this to my mother who searched "gardening" "NCAA March Madness" and "cooking" to help her find some interesting new folks to follow. To each their own, follows.

Soak up the beauty of kindness on Twitter.
People who seek only numbers, will get only numbers. I found new true friends, creative inspiration, personal connections, support, caring, business advice and best practices, a large network of people whom I care about everyday and who in turn feed my soul. I have so many great Twitter experiences to share but this is a fine example of the sharing community that makes it so awesome: I uploaded a two hour interview off of my digital voice recorder into my Mac and it erased the files. Panic set in…I did a few somersaults to calm myself down…and then spent the next 45 minutes on hold with the technical help number.

In comes Twitter. I decided while on the phone to ask my Tweeple if anyone had a potential solution. Within a minute, four people @AzureMarcommTX @Kbzon @Mama_Red and @andypohl came to my rescue. I spent the next hour plus the phone with Andy, coincidentally from my town, who walked me through the whole thing. Crisis averted. Friendship solidified! Beer owed :)

Twitter's mark on me is pronounced (hmm. I am wearing a shirt that says "eat. sleep. tweet" for Pete's sake. That is why I wanted to share the ways that I have optimized Twitter for my enjoyment. Seek out your mark. Your Twitter thumbprint is your own.

Leigh
@fleurdeleigh

Run for Reggie

2009-03-10T20:00:00.000-07:00

How many of us are touched by Cancer? Personally, I have lost six family members to its relentless grasp, had a personal scare of my own which makes me associate birthdays with mamograms, and feel a kinship with those who are braving Cancer.

A member of my husband's Buffalo Wild Wings team is battling stage three lung cancer and we are committed to helping him and his family. Paul has never been witness to the positive power of the social networking I believe runs rampant on sites like Twitter and Facebook so when he asked me to seek help, I told him I would go to my team (YOU, my network of fine folks) to make a difference.

Reggie Foster, father of two and active member of his church, is undergoing treatment for lung cancer his hometown of Owensboro, KY. His coworkers of the Buffalo Wild Wings team have committed themselves wholeheartedly to helping to raise 40K for Reggie & his family to defray the cost of cancer care. The BWW Running Team is lead by Directors of Operations, Peter Tomkins and Dale Gallion. My husband Paul, a Regional Manager, several other team members, family members and spouses are taking part in BWW's sponsored Run For Reggie on April 25th at Nashville's Country Music Marathon. Reggie's status and BWW's Reggie Foster Fund updates can be found at runforreggie.blogspot.com.

How can you help? Believe me, we feel the palpable economic crunch like everyone else. But Cancer doesn't have a recession. Treatments, bills, procedures continue and EVERY little bit we muster for Reggie counts.Perhaps your contribution will be a prayer for this man of great faith, a donation to the Reggie Foster Fund, or your pledge per mile or participation in one of the events in Nashville's Marathon this April. Please consider what you might do to help Reggie & his family. No one can do everything; Everyone can do something. We, the friends, family, BWW's coworkers of Reggie, sincerely appreciate your support.

Thanks for your time and support!

Please email us at runforreggie@gmail.com to make your contribution or mail your donation:

Buffalo Wild Wings
7714 Montgomery Road
Cincinnati, OH 45236
ATTN: Michelle Gould.
Please make checks out to: The Reggie Foster Fund.

Leigh Caraccioli
@fleurdeleigh

Visuals

2009-02-11T08:47:00.000-08:00

Spending a whole day at the Cleveland Clinic proved pleasantly surprising. While my little sister felt like a pin cushion, I had day full of Twitter, crosswords, a few new friends and some striking artwork. I wanted to share some visuals from that remarkably contemporary facility.

Hanging in the lobby was wire & steel poem, a stunning piece of art but hard read. Lora and I realized that we forgot to get a copy of the text available in print at the information desk. It was so much more than just a "W" and "E".

A thinking type man sat at the entrance and left me wondering why I couldn't read his face?

While outside trying to get reception for my phone, I ran into these two fellas fixing the gorgeous round still water, see-through pool. They asked me if I got there good side. The approaching policeman asked me if he needed to confiscate my NikonD300? Next step, media office to plea my case in dumb like fox blondness. Which worked :)

This photo doesn't do this felt sculpture any justice. So tactile! The muted colors and soft texture drew me and onlookers in. THIS is where the policeman should have been staked out because following the "please don't touch" rule proved impossible. For me, at least.

Edgar from the S Building gift shop became my BFF and hooked me up with a Blackberry phone charger (mine missing) which he let me borrow for the day. So I hooked him up with an Iced White Mocha Venti. Thanks, man!

The Un-Stoppable Optimism of Un-Marketing

2009-02-07T10:07:00.000-08:00

Scott Stratten
@unmarketing

Perhaps the best way to catch up with Internet wunderkind, President of Un-Marketing is to throw out a 140 character line in Twitter. For Scott Stratten (a.k.a @unmarketing) the self-labeled speaker and Jedi of viral marketing, Twitter is no tangent to be sure. Instead, it is a viral forum where he can help others (like him) build relationships, become a recognized expert in a field, build referrals and get current satisfied customers.

Because I have been afflicted with a penchant for social marketing on Talent Revolution, Facebook and Twitter, I have been able to witness Scott busy in action. You don't have to be online long before the @unmarketing sightings appear. He's everywhere. "On January 1, I vowed to go 30 days on Twitter with everything I got. And that's what I did. I literally, outside of teaching at the College a few times a week, I spent all my spare time on Twitter to build momentum," says Stratten.

What distinguishes Scott Stratten in social media also serves as the crux of the Un-Marketing approach: he is there for YOU, not himself. His amiable presence, his simple but savvy business videos, and his quick sense of humor have earned him nearly 10, 000 (fans) followers and a rock solid business. I can tell you first hand, it's not his song writing, singing ability or his music videos...(trust me on that one.)

Here's a Q & A with Canada's Scott Stratten:

Q: What was the catalyst behind the creation of "Un-Marketing"?

Scott: In the corporate world, I was a Sales Trainer. I kept hearing stories about the only way these people got new clients was to cold call and many them felt physically ill before going to do one. I asked each of them if they liked being cold called at home etc... and every one of them said no. I thought it was madness to try and market/sell to others in ways that you hated. Then after seeing all the costs VS returns on advertising etc.. and realizing that didn't work well either, I knew there had to be a better way. (cue the big drum sound) THE UN-MARKETING WAY!!!!!!!!

My theory (which is here) is that people buy from people they know, they buy from people they trust, and they buy from people that are viewed as experts. So in recruiting for example, since my career started out in HR and I used the services of recruitment firms from time-to-time, I used the firms that I learned from, that held sessions on how to retain good employees, that sponsored seminars with other experts, that gave me knowledge. In turn, that made me think of them as the authority in the field. That contrasts the other firms that would just cold call to tell me how great they were.

Q: For those of us who are new to Internet marketing, do mind explaining "Viral Marketing" and its benefits.

Scott: Viral Marketing is the same thing as word-of-mouth or "buzz" it's just usually attached to the online world. it's when you see something online and say to yourself "I HAVE TO SEND THIS TO ....." and off it goes. It has its own momentum.

Q: You have made 60 online movies that have been viewed over 60 million times. What was your initial reaction to such an overwhelming response, and what do you believe is the primary reason for this success?

Scott: The first movie I ever made was The Time Movie which was for my own motivational speaking business. My reaction when it blew up was to crap my pants. I was so unprepared for success that I literally turned off my computer and just sat there. (the entire story is on video ) However seeing something successful virally is pretty basic, and this is why the Time Movie worked: There are three reasons why something goes viral. 1. Emotional 2. Funny 3. WOW. If you can make someone feel one of those three things, they are gonna pass it around.

Q: You have become a Twitter mentor of sorts to countless followers. Tell us about someone who guided your Social Networking experience and how.

Scott: Well, I've been online since 1994. I don't mean I tried surfing the net for a bit off and on since 1994, I mean I've been ONLINE since then, I don't think I've ever logged off :-) And was doing social networking online before they called it that. I didn't have anyone show me the ropes, I used the same mindset as I did in HR and Marketing: People like to feel special, people appreciate it when you learn from them. My first big focus on Social biz networking online came with Ryze.com a few years ago then on to Facebook and now Twitter.

Q: Your famous tweet "Daily reminder to take 5 minutes to read other tweets and comment/reply/retweet. Nothing about you. Build, interact, give." hit home to me. Tell us your why you repeat it and have you ever received any unique or negative reactions to it? Like "Whaaat nothing about me...?"

Scott: I say it everyday for two reasons: 1. So it reminds people the best way to get is to give. We don't usually have to be reminded to talk about ourselves :-) 2. On Twitter 90% of people aren't online at any one time, and even fewer will see one specific tweet from you. So the more people I can have see it, the better. The only negative/unique responses I've had was one person said I recycle tweets, and that was wrong. So I told him to ask for his money back that he paid for the tweet and the unfollow button was right underneath my pretty picture.
**giggle**

Q: Go back a decade and share with us something you would have done differently. And something you're most glad you did do.

Scott: I would have positioned myself as the front man and made Un-Marketing a much more public brand, instead of being behind the scenes of everything. I know I have the personality and style that works out there (did I mention modesty too?) but just laid backed and worked off of referrals for years. That's not a way to build an empire, it's a way to go bankrupt, and I almost did. Never rely on one source for your business. I would of built multiple funnels that would perpetually bring business to me.

Q: You are extremely gracious when interacting in social media and I wonder if that becomes overwhelming. How to you manage to keep above your mailbox and maintain such an intricate network of followers, friends and clients?

Scott: I have a motto "If you believe relationships build your business, then building them should BE your business." My job is relationships, everything else can be delegated. I don't get email notifications anymore except for direct message. I auto-follow those that follow me, because if I tried to read every profile before adding them, THAT would be overwhelming. I use TweetDeck and it keeps it flowing.

Q: What projects and/goals are in the immediate future for Un-Marketing?

Scott: Have 20,000 followers on Twitter and then throw the biggest Tweet-up bash in Vegas the world has ever seen. After that... who knows :-)

We're in! We appreciate Scott for taking time away from the computer, Blackberry and business to enlighten us here at Talent Revolution. You are an inspiration and a role model and a man clearly living your ultimate career lifestyle.

Special thanks to my TR collaborators Chris Reed & Amanda Hite !

Leigh
@fleurdeleigh

The 2 biggest little words

2009-02-07T09:19:00.000-08:00

With business booming, contacts growing, and life in general flourishing, I find it important to take a moment to consider the impact of two little words. Thank you.

Because I feel luck abounds in my personal and professional life, I have started to take daily pause in my day to thank 5, maybe 10 people giving gratuity where due and perhaps surprising someone with a little grateful spirit. What has happened since is remarkable.

The notion came to me when my husband Paul left a post it note on the mirror saying “Thanks for being my wife.” Simple. Yet I folded it and put in my billfold and carried it with me. What I realized was a) I’ve got a keeper and b) that we share a fundamental need to be recognized, to be appreciated.

I am rather new to social networking and have begun to make my way around some networking sites like Facebook, Linked-In, Talent Revolution-the career networking site that serves as a second job for me and my new fave, Twitter. What I noticed that in all of them I was amazed by how many times I saw those two little BIG words. “Thank you for your kind words.” “Thank you for taking the time to read my blog.” “Thanks for your awesomeness.” “Thanks for the follow...” “Thanks for opening my eyes...”

Not only is gratuity a noble habit, but it is a great business approach. The amount it takes to shoot an email, a text message, a phone call to a client is trace. The impact of those little words can loom large. In my recent Adventures in Twitterland, I decided that I was going to use my manners, be my socially true self, and reach out to ALL my followers with a little thank you note because I felt it was the right thing to do. Nevermind, that I am now hundreds of folks behind in my “hello” notes as I visit all websites looking for what drives that person. I have considered Twitter tools advised by others like the auto direct message (DM) and have opted out. They don’t ring true to me. But at least they contain those two words, Thank you. (so if you just started following me, please be patient :)

What ensued from a habit of saying “thank you” earnestly was a big giant snowball of good stuff. Connections with fabulous folks, mentions here and there, new business, unsolicited assistance. You name it. Good things come to those who are grateful. I’m living proof.

Instead, I have been sending roughly 30 people a day a genuine “thank you” letting them know that they have been impactful, kind, eye opening, a good father, mother, or friend. A sage business associate, a good well-manner kid. Don’t forget to shed light on the kindness of others. Especially, the ones right next to us. It can be for big stuff or little stuff. (like a note in my daughter’s book bag that says, “Thanks for your big smile. It makes me happy.” You may be lucky enough to make someone else’s day.

And...thank you for taking the time to read this blog. Now go forth and thank a few special people.

Adventures in Twitterland

2009-02-07T04:25:00.000-08:00

Two weeks ago, I was fumbling around on Twitter in a serious tangent on an unproductive day. (yep, just that one day...) I was not entirely new to the social networking experience and was adding “what are you doing now” type tweets every so often engaging in a little self absorption. But on that day, I tried something entirely different. I listened. I started to read interesting blogs about how to get the most out of Twitter, explored links to strange new places, heard people, absorbed advice and then realized I had lost hours of time...From that day forth, my Twitter experience evolved like an emergence from a chrysalis.

Suddenly, Twitter no longer served as a glorified test messaging diary but turned into a powerful networking entity. (I hear many of you saying, “duh...”) The loudest message came from sage social networker, Scott Stratten, big time microblogger and self-proclaimed Speaker & Jedi of viral marketing. He regularly tweets, “daily reminder to read other tweets and comment/reply/retweet. Nothing about you. Build, interact, give.” Simply stated, but also the crux of what makes Twitter so valuable. It was my first lightbulb Twitter moment.

Here are a few actions that I took making my Adventures in Twitterland profound this last week.

Say thank you. Ask how you can help.
Let’s face it. We are all short on time. But earnest expression of gratitude and extension of help are actions well worth their time. The Twitter experience will feel cold if you don’t reach out to people so be genuine, thoughtful, interested and see what ensues. I assure you. You’ll be glad you did. Who knows, you may connect with some great people. If you’re lucky, you’ll gain recognition and the business will follow. People like Graham Smith @imjustcreative, and Rajesh Pancholi @r27 , Scott Stratten @unmarketing, Talent Revolution member Laurie Ruettimann sent me out in their network and because of them my followers went from 67 to 500 in less than two weeks.

Learn by following links.
Without taking a moment to enter a link, you are just walking down a hallway without ever opening a door. What an incredible resource it can be if used properly. A friend sent me a “how to” link instructing me the proper way to clean sticky keyboard keys because I had asked in a tweet. Here are two great links: an interview from Paddy Donnelly's awesome blog with Guy Kawasaki, THE man on all things Twitter "How I Twitter" And another from Calvin Lee of Mayhem Studios resident “really nice guy” and how he twitters. Spend a bit of time clinking those links and you'll learn volumes.

Retweet. I repeat, retweet.
So much information streams by you like speed boats on the water so I started marking cool/funny/insiteful tweets as “favorites”. That way, I could share by rebroadcasting (retweet or RT) them with my followers who may not have benefited from them the first time around. If you see something that stops you or moves you, retweet it. This is also one way you can say thanks to folks who have helped you.

Shed the ego.
For some in Twitterland, followers are a status symbol. Yes, Twitter appeals to the narcissist in all of us and yes, it is nice on the ego when people reach out to you. But the moment you stop seeing followers as a “SUM” and see them as “SOMEONE” is the moment that twitter becomes meaningful. (Not that Guy Kawasaki’s 53,602 followers don’t make his experience meaningful :)

Take some time each week to find cool people to follow. Engage.
Take advantage of follow friday where people send tweets listing folks they recommend. I save these as favorites and add them during the week. People whose tweet style I like, typically have spot on recommendations. I have connected with awesome folks this way.

Believe in the Karma.
There is a Buddhist philosophy about Karma that goes something like this: Good Karma has pure intentions.Often Tweeter’s intentions are see-through. If you send a direct message (DM) that includes your website, your blog, your product before a relationship is established, your intention is self-serving and transparent. If you are trying to get a buck of Twitter in a DM, you’re going about it the wrong way. Dig in. You are sure to find ways to bolster your online business or add revenue to your pockets. The information is out there if you search. Do good for others for no reason. Think honestly about your intentions.

Mind your manners
My mom often said, “If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all.” The rule applies in Twitterland. In my decades in business, I have learned that good manners make the work place fun and profitable. Promote nice. Play nice. Be nice.

Hopefully, you'll find these tips useful. I don’t expect you to have the same awakening that I experienced in my last week or so on Twitter, but I want you to have this information so you as least have the opportunity. May your Adventures in Twitterland be brilliant and fun.

5 Career Lesson Disguised as Failures

2009-02-07T03:44:00.001-08:00

Here we are at the dawn of 2009 and surely many of you are looking ahead, formulating resolutions, financial goals, staffing or just thinking about your ideal destinations for the upcoming year. "Where will the road take me in '09). Being a bit backward at everything, I pose a different challenge. Think for a moment with me about the road behind you. Here are 5 of my personal career "failures" that remarkably turned out to be valuable life changing lessons.

5. (backwards, I told you) I worked in a plastics company as a Sales & Marketing Manager. I failed to look at the environment in which I thrive personally & professionally. Not ashamed to say that I like "pretty" places. This job had me in a stinky antiquated environment, meeting with dry Rocket Scientists who didn't get me or me them, and It drained all my energy. That and the job of department head was too big for me. I had no Marketing experience and had to wing it. Departmental budgeting was hell. (We did have a company plane though which was sooo cool.)Lesson: Go & grow where you'll thrive. Take a good look before taking a job that will move you up on the ladder, fill your poketbook but leave you everyday being someone you're not.

4. Then I worked for a elitist dictator. As creative director for an advertising firm. My boss had absolutely no people skills, hired me to be the people person for the team building loyalty and business for the firm. In the end, as much as I tried to rally the team to succeed, she showed them repeatedly that she cared nothing for her staff. Do yourself a favor, scrutinize who you are going to work for. Working for bosses that suck, sucks. Lesson: Work for people/companies that genuinely care and YES they are out there. I work for one of them!

3. I got fired, let go, served severance! I was a victim of the Pink Slip Epidemic (see Amanda Hite's blog :) ) So I took a few years off, licking my wounds and I didn't work. I played a lot of golf and fell into a giant bunker of unhappiness. Lesson: Idle time is the devil's playground but it can really shave numbers off your golf handicap.

4. I taught creative writing to college students. Fabulous. But not with a fancy salary. I found myself sacrificing emotional reward for financial reward. I was young (22 years old) and overly ambitious. I was lured away from noble teaching and took a the job that led me down the sales road for the next ten years. Turns out as one of my big regrets. I still substitute teach occasionally and accept that I may never get ROI on my Master's investment. Lesson: Define your personal "payment" terms. Seek to fill your emotional bank and your piggy bank at the same time.

5. I was a beer rep for a distributor and sold what I called "candy to babies". It was perfect for me, a recently divorced, single mom who needed an easy win in a fun career arena. My daughter reminds me about getting dropped off to school in mommy's Miller Lite truck. This was a turning point in my life. While it seemed like a strange fraternaty type role for me, I met my darling husband Paul and married him a few months after. Lesson: Your career journey will take you down unusual roads. Enjoy the ride. And, marry your soulmate when you meet him. :)

For those of you who don't know me, I am a Talent Agent with Talent Revolution and owner of my photography company, fleur de leigh. As one of my Twitter friends said it, "You're so lucky" to be doing what you love. I say the road to this lucky place (performing my dream jobs and living my UCL) was bumpy and bendy and often wild...but full of self discovery.

That enlightenment got me here.